bringing up BOYS-Part 7

"Children get their values and beliefs from what they see modeled at home. It is one reason why moms and dads must live a morally consistent life in front of their kids. If they hope to win them for Christ, they can't afford to be casual or whimsical about the things they believe. If you as a parent act as though there is no absolute truth, and if you are too busy to pray and attend church services together, and if your kids are allowed to play soccer or Little League during Sunday school, and if you cheat on your income tax or lie to the bill collector or fight endlessly with your neighbors, your children will get the message. 'Mom and Dad talk a good game, but they don't really believe it.' If you serve them this weak soup throughout childhood, they will spew it out when given the opportunity. Any ethical weak spot of this nature-any lack of clarity on matters of right and wrong-will be noted and magnified by the next generation."

"'The earlier the better' when it comes to introducing our children to the Lord. Furthermore, everything we do during those foundational child-rearing years should be bathed in prayer. There is not enough knowledge in the books-not in this one or any other-to secure the outcome of our parenting responsibility without divine help. It is arrogant to think that we can shepherd our kids safely through the minefields of an increasingly sinful society."

"Once your children have reached the latter years of adolcescence, it will be important not to push them too hard spiritually. You can still have reasonable expectations for them as long as they are under your roof, but you can't demand that they believe what they have been taught. The door must be opened fully to the world outside. This can be the most frightening time of parenthood. The tendency is to retain control in order to keep your kids from making mistakes. However, teenagers and young adults are more likely to make the proper choices when they aren't forced to rebel in order to escape. The simple truth is that love demands freedom. They go hand in hand. No matter how much you prepare, letting go is never easy. It's an exhilarating and terrifying moment, and one that was ordained from the day of your child's birth. With this final release, your task as a parent is finished."